Since my last post I have finished both "Jitterbug Perfume" by Tom Robbins and "A Long Way Down" by Nick Hornby. It was funny, the day I finished the Hornby book I went out with this guy who explained to me that a co-worker once told him that he was a lot like Rob, the main character in High Fidelity, which then provoked him to go buy the book. He read it and thought that Rob was a real bastard, didn’t like the book and told me that he hasn’t really read anything since. I thought that was funny, especially since this was after I had just told him how much I liked Hornby’s writing and found his new book, A Long Way Down and its dry humor extremely entertaining (in a slightly sick way). I must say, Hornby’s satirical, cheeky prose are in great contrast to Robbin’s literary style in Jitterbug Perfume, with metaphors and similes packed in as tight as latté drinking lobbyists in DC subways at 7am on a Monday morning, but none the less I really enjoyed it. I honestly don’t know if I can hang out with this guy anymore. I mean, if he doesn’t like Hornby’s peculiar sense of humor he probably won’t like mine … besides I am attracted to guys like Rob in High Fidelity, so I guess he was saying I have a taste in bastards. Anyway, to add to the diversity of this literary mishmash and continue my cerebral pursuit I started the book, "Reading Lolita in Tehran". It was given to me a while ago and I left it in LAX on my way to South Africa. I shelled out the cash at the airport so that I would have something to read on the plane (I was in Orlando working at a conference) and so far, so good.
In other news, I went and saw Batman Begins with Ashley Heistand, Ehubb, Kyle Ballard (and three of Kyle’s DC friends) at the Georgetown Waterfront this weekend. It was great, the 7 o’clock showing was sold out so we purchased tickets for 8 o’clock and went down to the waterfront to play while we waited. No more than five-minutes into our waterfront walk helicopters began to circle overhead and the Potomac swarmed with half a dozen boat police. As we turned towards the river, a fire-truck pulled up behind us. I wish I had more to say about this exciting event, but we never found out why they were there … secret FBI stuff, I’m sure. Anyway, I liked Batman Begins and Christian Bale was one of the better Batman’s I’ve seen … Katie Holmes’ crooked smile got to me by the end of the movie, but otherwise I had some good ol’ fashioned fun.
Orlando was muggy. I didn’t get to go on any rides or see any Disney characters (this did not disappoint me, I may be a big kid at heart but weirdos earning minimum wage in Disney costumes freak me out) and I ate at lots of over-priced, mediocre restaurants. I’m back in DC and back to the grind …
My creativity has disappeared and I need to eat.
Love and Spaghetti,
Jessie
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Monday, June 13, 2005
"Don't point that gun at him, he's an unpaid intern!"
My internship is hard. Not just busy, but hard. As most of you know, I do the busy thing a lot and many people mistake my being extremely busy for me working hard. To be honest, I don’t think that I usually work all that hard, I just stay busy (which isn’t to say it isn’t exhausting, but it usually isn’t all that hard). Anyway, this summer is my reality check into solid, demanding, brain-splitting work. A lot is being asked of me and I am acutely aware of my shortcomings and am constantly questioning my own abilities to accomplish the tasks with which I have been entrusted. Most of the inadequacies that I am referring to are in my research assistant job at Carnegie, however, I would be lying if I didn’t admit to being a little limited in my bartending skills. You will be glad to hear however that those inadequacies have quickly been compensated by my superior bullshitting skills. An example: A customer will often ask me to recommend a wine,to which one of my many crafted responses is, “well, on a cold evening in December I would go for a glass of our Cabernet Sauvignon, however on a warm night like tonight, I would definitely recommend the Pinot Grigio, our lightest of whites and certainly my favorite on the list.” Or even better, when 5 guys told me they wanted their Woodford Reserve bourbon on the rocks with soda (me, full well knowing you are supposed to drink bourbon straight-up, maybe on ice but certainly NOT with soda) exclaimed in a cute, slightly flirtatious proclamation, “alrighty boys, I’ll go get your rocks and soda, but that certainly isn’t how I drink MY bourbon.” Yes, you would be happy to know that they tipped me quite well, however something tells me it wasn’t because I seemed to know something about hard liquor. By the end of the summer, I think I will be able to write a novel, Lies and Deception; Tails of the Straight-Edge Bartender.
So that gives it away to those of you who don't know. Aside from Eric (who cheated and has already visited me at work once) no one correctly guessed my temporary occupation. Now you know! I am a waitress and bartender at the Iron Gate Restaurant on N street. A quaint little place, so when you think of me bartending don’t think of me in tight jeans, singing and dancing on a bar counter Coyote Ugly style (well, you imagine me that way if you WANT, who am I to interrupt your fantasies) but rather, imagine me slowly making mixed drinks and martini’s for 50 year-old alcoholic women who sit at my bar (who probably love me because I tend to over pour on the alcohol) and then pouring a lot of glasses of wine and opening a lot of bottles of beer for the sophisticated international crowd that frequents the place (World Bank, UN Foundation, government). Did I mention that I waited on John McLauchlin, Deputy Director of the CIA last week and that Cokie Roberts from NPR also came by?
If you want to check out a review (albeit, an old one) of the restaurant go to:
http://dcpages.com/Dining/Reviews/IronGate.shtml
Oh, and the stories that I am accumulating from this job! For now, I will share just two. . .
I brought another round of drinks to a table that I had been serving in my bar area. Now, the crowd at the Iron Gate rarely falls under the age of 40, but here sat a refreshing group of upper-20’s who had been chatting it up with me. I had forgotten one person’s beverage so as I was walking away, the girl whose drink I forgot called sweetly after me “can I still get that Foggy Bottom” to which I replied loudly from across the breeze-way where my bar is, “Ohhhh, I’ll get your Foggy Bottom.” As I walked away to get her a cold beer all I could hear was howls of laughter from the table and comments from some of the guys including, “No, no I’ll get YOUR Foggy Bottom” and so on and so fourth. This is one of a million times in the past two-weeks that I have embarrassed myself at work. But if I don’t make a fool of myself, someone else would have to … I might as well sacrifice my dignity for the good of the whole. Besides, they are entertained and I get more tips.
My other story needs to be prefaced by the fact that both of the jobs that I work here are in the Dupont Circle area of DC. For those of you who don’t know DC, Dupont Circle is the gay center of the city. Because of our location, gay couples frequent the restaurant and I have made friends with quite a few. One particular couple enjoyed talking with me so much that by the end of the evening they felt comfortable jumping to a more personal plane of conversation which began something like, “Now, I know this will sound really weird … but our maid just left and José and I have an extra room in our house … well, we really need someone to help us and you are just so sweet. Would you be interested in living with us? We just need help with cooking, cleaning, ironing our shirts … we would of course give you free rent and we would pay you too. We just live around the corner.” Imagine the look on MY face as this conversation progressed. I was asked by a gay couple to be their maid. Maybe you would have had to have been there to see the hilarity in the situation, but wow .. I was cracking up insde. If I weren’t so damn honest, I would have lied to them about my domestic abilities and accepted the offer. I felt guilty and told them that while I am able to take care of myself, I doubt that I would be able to help them at the standard to which they are accustomed to (I asked them to call me if they just wanted someone to pay rent to which they replied, “sweetie … Paul and I don’t need the money, we need the help" ... giving me the impression that their standards would, in fact, be higher than I could hope to live up to). While this story has other fun twist and turns, I will spare you the details. In the end, they complimented me on my service and told me that they would come back next week with their niece who is visiting from Puerto Rico who is interested in international relations. So really, when I complain to you all about not meeting people here in DC and about how lonely I am, what I am really trying to say is … where are all the straight men and why do I seem only to attract good looking gay men?
Some other things that I have done:
*Cruised Georgetown with Eric, a couple different times. We also saw Madagascar last week. That movie is FUNNY. In our exploration of the city, we visited the Hill and checked out the office building where Eric’s internship is located. I have included pictures of him at the Hill.
*Checked out the East Wing of the National Gallery of Art on the last day of the Toulouse-Lautrec and Monmartre exhibition. Interesting exhibit on the artists and works produced at Monmartre in Paris. I have to admit, I went to the museum because I heard of their excellent gelato, the art was merely a second reason to go. On this particular adventure, I also visited the sculpture garden at the Hirschorn museum … definitely a place to which I will return.
*Completed the Phillip Pullman Golden Compass books and have started on Jitterbug Perfume. I am already half-way through it. The subway commute provides excellent literary endulgence time.
*Watched the gay PRIDE parade in Dupont Circle and went to the PRIDE festival at the capitol the following day (Oh, THIS is why I am not meeting straight men …. I see).
*Finished editing Amr’s two chapters for the book manuscript. The book is due for publication soon (I also did all the final prep on the book manuscript) and I will have my name in a footnote!
*Worked a ton and made $446 in tips over the course of three shifts at the bar and one lunch shift last week. By my calculations at $7 an hour multiplied by the 22 hours that I worked plus the $446 I made in tips it turns out I am making about $27 an hour. Not bad.
Ok, this is long enough. I still owe my list of observations … which I have been neglecting due to my lack of creativity.
So there you have it, it was less than a month between posts, aren’t you proud?
Love, Lies and Rainbows,
Jessie
So that gives it away to those of you who don't know. Aside from Eric (who cheated and has already visited me at work once) no one correctly guessed my temporary occupation. Now you know! I am a waitress and bartender at the Iron Gate Restaurant on N street. A quaint little place, so when you think of me bartending don’t think of me in tight jeans, singing and dancing on a bar counter Coyote Ugly style (well, you imagine me that way if you WANT, who am I to interrupt your fantasies) but rather, imagine me slowly making mixed drinks and martini’s for 50 year-old alcoholic women who sit at my bar (who probably love me because I tend to over pour on the alcohol) and then pouring a lot of glasses of wine and opening a lot of bottles of beer for the sophisticated international crowd that frequents the place (World Bank, UN Foundation, government). Did I mention that I waited on John McLauchlin, Deputy Director of the CIA last week and that Cokie Roberts from NPR also came by?
If you want to check out a review (albeit, an old one) of the restaurant go to:
http://dcpages.com/Dining/Reviews/IronGate.shtml
Oh, and the stories that I am accumulating from this job! For now, I will share just two. . .
I brought another round of drinks to a table that I had been serving in my bar area. Now, the crowd at the Iron Gate rarely falls under the age of 40, but here sat a refreshing group of upper-20’s who had been chatting it up with me. I had forgotten one person’s beverage so as I was walking away, the girl whose drink I forgot called sweetly after me “can I still get that Foggy Bottom” to which I replied loudly from across the breeze-way where my bar is, “Ohhhh, I’ll get your Foggy Bottom.” As I walked away to get her a cold beer all I could hear was howls of laughter from the table and comments from some of the guys including, “No, no I’ll get YOUR Foggy Bottom” and so on and so fourth. This is one of a million times in the past two-weeks that I have embarrassed myself at work. But if I don’t make a fool of myself, someone else would have to … I might as well sacrifice my dignity for the good of the whole. Besides, they are entertained and I get more tips.
My other story needs to be prefaced by the fact that both of the jobs that I work here are in the Dupont Circle area of DC. For those of you who don’t know DC, Dupont Circle is the gay center of the city. Because of our location, gay couples frequent the restaurant and I have made friends with quite a few. One particular couple enjoyed talking with me so much that by the end of the evening they felt comfortable jumping to a more personal plane of conversation which began something like, “Now, I know this will sound really weird … but our maid just left and José and I have an extra room in our house … well, we really need someone to help us and you are just so sweet. Would you be interested in living with us? We just need help with cooking, cleaning, ironing our shirts … we would of course give you free rent and we would pay you too. We just live around the corner.” Imagine the look on MY face as this conversation progressed. I was asked by a gay couple to be their maid. Maybe you would have had to have been there to see the hilarity in the situation, but wow .. I was cracking up insde. If I weren’t so damn honest, I would have lied to them about my domestic abilities and accepted the offer. I felt guilty and told them that while I am able to take care of myself, I doubt that I would be able to help them at the standard to which they are accustomed to (I asked them to call me if they just wanted someone to pay rent to which they replied, “sweetie … Paul and I don’t need the money, we need the help" ... giving me the impression that their standards would, in fact, be higher than I could hope to live up to). While this story has other fun twist and turns, I will spare you the details. In the end, they complimented me on my service and told me that they would come back next week with their niece who is visiting from Puerto Rico who is interested in international relations. So really, when I complain to you all about not meeting people here in DC and about how lonely I am, what I am really trying to say is … where are all the straight men and why do I seem only to attract good looking gay men?
Some other things that I have done:
*Cruised Georgetown with Eric, a couple different times. We also saw Madagascar last week. That movie is FUNNY. In our exploration of the city, we visited the Hill and checked out the office building where Eric’s internship is located. I have included pictures of him at the Hill.
*Checked out the East Wing of the National Gallery of Art on the last day of the Toulouse-Lautrec and Monmartre exhibition. Interesting exhibit on the artists and works produced at Monmartre in Paris. I have to admit, I went to the museum because I heard of their excellent gelato, the art was merely a second reason to go. On this particular adventure, I also visited the sculpture garden at the Hirschorn museum … definitely a place to which I will return.
*Completed the Phillip Pullman Golden Compass books and have started on Jitterbug Perfume. I am already half-way through it. The subway commute provides excellent literary endulgence time.
*Watched the gay PRIDE parade in Dupont Circle and went to the PRIDE festival at the capitol the following day (Oh, THIS is why I am not meeting straight men …. I see).
*Finished editing Amr’s two chapters for the book manuscript. The book is due for publication soon (I also did all the final prep on the book manuscript) and I will have my name in a footnote!
*Worked a ton and made $446 in tips over the course of three shifts at the bar and one lunch shift last week. By my calculations at $7 an hour multiplied by the 22 hours that I worked plus the $446 I made in tips it turns out I am making about $27 an hour. Not bad.
Ok, this is long enough. I still owe my list of observations … which I have been neglecting due to my lack of creativity.
So there you have it, it was less than a month between posts, aren’t you proud?
Love, Lies and Rainbows,
Jessie
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